You and your midi speakers...
Yeah...I don't care if you have the hottest latest 3G phone. Blasting the latest Lil Wayne track in the communal hallway is freaking annoying! Take you're tired lollipop song and your crap cell phone and go in your house. Get a job, earn money, and buy a real sound system like the rest of us who live in the 21st century. Jack ass...
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You and your car speakers....
Yeah, you're no better than the jerk off in item one. You and your tired friends sit outside all day blasting music from your car because you're all too cheap to buy a decent sound system and go IN YOUR HOUSE and listen to music...you too get to be called a jackass.
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You and your lazy ass friends sitting on the front steps...
Or in the hallway when it's cold out. Dude...I'm supposed to find you attractive when I always see your sorry self sitting around looking lost and vacant. Gee, I don't know why I don't want to go out with you...or even respond when you say hello. Hmmm a grown man who never does anything but sit like a loser...definitely someone I should bring home to meet mom.
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The bootleg "chicks" in my neighborhood who respond to honking cars...
I would love to smack all of you in the back of the head. Running across the street to say "Hi" to the latest Lil Wayne wanna-be as he honks at you because he's too lazy to stop the car, get out and say hello properly makes very nice well brought up ladies like myself get pissed. Now...hoodrat dude who honked at you thinks that he should honk at every woman, and we should all be running across streets, falling all over ourselves to say hello.
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Do-rags in the daytime...
It is one thing to wrap your head up really fast because you're on your way to the salon, or you were grabbing the morning paper/sending the kids off to school. But seriously...send someone else out to go grocery shopping, or do your errands, or take the train an hour and a half into the city for whatever reason. Even if you rock the Louis Vuitton or Gucci scarf on your head...your look is not complete...and you are not or never will be the hotness with a do-rag wrapped around your head all day long.
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The "what's good ma" dudes...
What's really good is not hearing you ask me what's good. What's really good is realizing that the only "ma" you have is the "ma" who popped you out however many years ago. Go find her and ask her what's good...and she might tell you that what's reaaallly good is you getting a job and not being a lazy s.o.b. who sits on the stoop all day. Long story short - nothing is good for you with me, so don't ask...and I'm not your "ma". Save that for the chicken head twits who run after cars.
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The Slanty Eyed Angry Glare Chicks..
Get over yourself. There's nothing you have that I want...including your angry demeanor, crusty dude, and "I have nothing to do all day" lazy attitude as you too sit on the stoop with the lazy dudes. So, now that we've got that out of the way...there's no point in glaring at me because I always seem to have somewhere to be or something to do (read: I have purpose in my life). Rest assured your crusty dude and less than enticing lifestyle are safe from me.
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The "F*** You, You're Ugly" After They try to "Holla" Dudes...
No sweetie...f*** you. :) I'm not the one who approached someone and couldn't handle rejection so...who's the punk a$$ bi*ch now? ;)
Next time...don't say hello and your pathetic excuse for a fragile ego won't get broken when I ignore you and your crusty friends who sit on the stoop with the crusty slanty eyed angry glare chicks from above.
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The "You Don't Want to Smile at Me?!" Dudes...
No I don't. Next time you see a "hey I'm lonely and so desperate that I'll talk to anyone, even you" sign on my back...feel free to approach. Until then...no I don't have to say "hi" to you and no, I don't have to smile at you. My social stock would plummet like 1929 if I did.
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The "You Think You Too Good to Talk to Me?!" Dudes...
Ummm yeah I do basically. :) See item #9...my social stock would plummet if I talked to you. Let's just say the chicks you talk to are penny stocks that haven't raised their value in 20 years, and I'm Google with people speculating on the next Google killer and finding none. If that analogy went over your head...then yeah...I can't let my social stock crash like the crash of '29 by talking to you.
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OnMyList
List your pants off!