Address Discrimination
Practiced particularly by food delivery organizations with delicious flounder, whereby, they refuse to deliver an order beyond a specific boundary.
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Airing of Grievances
One of the rituals of Festivus.
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Anti-Dentite
Term used to refer to a person who is vehemently opposed to anything associated with dentists or dentistry.
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Bad Breaker Upper
Someone who cannot end a relationship without offensive insults.
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Bad Naked
Unattractive actions performed in the nude such as crouching, coughing, straining to open a pickle jar, or belt sanding.
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Baldist
A woman who has never gone out with a bald man, a person who discriminates against bald people.
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Big salad
A salad containing big lettuce, big carrots, and tomatoes like volleyballs. A salad that comes in a big bowl.
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Bizarro
An adjective meaning the exact opposite. Examples: Bizarro Jerry (reliable, considerate friend) and Bizarro Superman (says hello when he leaves and goodbye when he arrives).
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Bootros Bootros Golly
An exclamation of astonished joy. Possible use would be when a man witnesses a woman sunbathing topless on a beach in the Hamptons.
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Breakup by Association
Situation in which one can no longer be friends with another because that person has broken up with one's friend.
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Call waiting face-off
A phone call is interrupted by another call waiting...the person fielding both calls is forced to make a decision between the two.
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Cell Phone Walk-n-Talk
Conversation one has on their mobile phone to kill time as they walk to their destination.
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Close Talker
A person who stands extremely close to another person when speaking to that person.
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Covenant Of The Keys
An agreement generally made by neighbors whereby each participant maintains a key to the other's dwelling. The key is to be used for emergency purposes only such as a lockout. Misuse of the key can result in one losing key privileges.
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Degifting
The process of giving a gift and then asking the recipient to return it. Example: You know those super bowl tickets I gave you earlier? Can I have them back? It turns out that I can use them after all.
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Double-dipping
A specific technique of eating chips. You take a dip with your chip, take a bite and dip it again.
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Dream Spot
The most ideal and perfect parking space possible.
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Excuse Rolodex
Rolodex used to provide excuses for avoiding outings, meetings, conversations or general get togethers with annoying childhood friends you were only friends with in the first place because they had a ping pong table.
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Face Painter
A person who paints their face with their favorite sports teams colors and/or logos to support the team.
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Fake Number
A number given to an undesirable potential date.
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False Reflecting
The image that skinny mirrors gives one. One looks better in the mirror than in reality.
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Feats of Strength
One of the rituals of Festivus.
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Festivus
A holiday that Frank Costanza made up because he did not like all the advertisements and holiday jingles for all other holidays. It is celebrated on December 23rd. Slogan-"A Festivus for the rest-iv-us!"
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Flagged book
A book taken into a public restroom. Once "flagged," a book cannot be returned to the store for credit or donated to charity.
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Full-turn
A move employed in a movie theater usually combinded with the eye roll. This technique is usually employed after the "half-turn" fails to quiet the talkative people sitting behind one in a theater.
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Get out
Phrase in which the speaker displays his or her state of disbelief.
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Giddy-up.
A phrase indicating agreement or an urging to proceed.
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Go out on a high note
An act of showmanship whereby the speaker, after making a comment that delights his audience, leaves the premises, thus he will go out on a high note and not risk making lesser comments.
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Good naked
Graceful actions performed while in the nude such as hair brushing.
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Half-turn
A gesture using one's head to express displeasure with the loud patrons sitting behind one in a movie theater.
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Hand sandwich
A type of hand shake also known as the "Two hander." Comprised of "The hand on the bottom, the hand on the top, the warm look in the eyes." Greeting is open to interpretation because much depends on the layering and the quality of the wetness in the eyes.
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Happy Pappy
A phrase used to inquire if an individual is pleased about something.
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High hair
Hair that elevates abnormally above one's scalp. Example: Kramer was identified in a police lineup as the guy with high hair.
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High-talker
A male who speaks in such a high voice, he is often mistaken for a woman.
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Hoochie Mama
Alternative to Serenity Now (see Serenity Now for it's definition) because as we all know, Serenity Now, Insanity Later.
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I'm down
Phrase used to confirm one's participation in a certain event or activity.
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Library Cop
Person designated to enforce the rules of a library with special emphasis on collecting fines for delinquent books.
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Little kicks
Elaine's dance involving short kicks and pointing thumbs.
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Long talker
One who rambles on and on and on and on.....
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Low talker
Person who speaks so quietly that one is unable to distinguish what was said.
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Master of One's Domain
A phrase indicating a person's abilty to refrain from personal gratification.
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Mental Alarm
A function of the brain that allows one to mentally set a wake up time, negating the need for an alarm clock.
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Muffin Stumps
The bottom parts of muffins that are usually thrown away or discarded.
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Multiple Sneezer
A person who sneezes more than once in succession.
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Newman
A curse word one uses when things don't go your way.
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Not That There's Anything Wrong With That
Phrase used to denote acceptance towards gay people.
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Out There
The state of being unencumbered by lower undergarments
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Perfect Pick-up
Pulling up to the airport terminal at exactly the same moment as the people you are meeting walk out of the same terminal.
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Pre-Emptive Breakup
The act of turning the tables on someone who is about to break up with you by breaking up with them first, so as to gain the upper hand.
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Put the Kibosh On
To interrupt, disturb or terminate one's peaceful existence.
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Regifting
The process of receiving a gift from someone and then turning around and giving it to someone else as a gift.
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Relationship Intern
An assistant to a man dating a woman who helps with girl problems because neither of them can handle a woman by himself.
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Serenity Now
A phrase shouted at the top of your lungs to relieve stress.
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Shrinkage
The phenomenon by which a certain part of the male anatomy suffers from a size reduction after swimming in cold water.
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Spongeworthy
An attribute or quality of a man that makes him acceptable for love making (worthy of using the contraceptive sponge with). These qualities must be stronger when the sponge count goes down.
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Step Skipper
Person who can go through at least 6 steps of treatment for alcoholism in a day by not actually doing the steps. (step 9 in particular.)
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Surprise Blindfold Greeting
A greeting wherein the greeter sneaks up on the greetee, placing his or her hands over the greetee's eyes and says, "Guess who."
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Sweet Fancy Moses
Exclamation of surprise. A phrase used by Jerry and George when watching Elaine dance (See also Whoa, Nelson!)
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This and That
Term created by Jerry and Elaine referring to friendship and sex.
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Tippy-Toe Lemon Tree
Code phrase to alert one of another's pending arrival.
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Two Face
A woman whose appearance changes (for better and worse) depending on lighting conditions.
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Unauthorized Hi
When one tells another "hi" from a third party, when the third party actually never said "hi."
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Vile Weed
Can be used to describe any loathsome, unpleasant, undesirable or objectionable green vegetable. Example: Newman's term for broccoli.
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Whoa, Nelson!
Exclamation of surprise. (See also Sweet Fancy Moses!)
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Yada Yada Yada
The act of leaving out a very important and descriptive part of a conversation (usually the intimate part).
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OnMyList
List your pants off!