Top 5 Ways Television Can Benefit From Possible Writers Strike
246 days ago
Updated 245 days ago
425 Views
4 Comments
Rate This
Introduction
Wednesday night the Writer's Guild of America's most recent contract ended at midnight. A new contract was being discussed with writers and producers, but the talks broke off during the night with no resolution. It's not entirely a bad thing. Let's face it; unscripted television is beginning to take over. Here's some television shows that might be better off with a writer's strike.
1
Every Pre-Teen Series on Disney
I know whereof I speak on this one. This channel is on my television more often than not, and the problem is, it seems like the writers are already on strike. The same episodes of That's So Raven, The Suite Life of Zach and Cody, and Hannah Montana seem to be on a loop repeating weekly.
Either all the episodes have the same plot, or I keep seeing the DJ Tanner plays new teacher for Raven and Raven goes camping episodes over and over. I also keep seeing Zach and Cody keeping the hotel chef from late-night snacking and Maddie writing a children's book about London's dog until my eyes burn. The worst offender seems to be Hannah Montana, though. I keep seeing Hannah's brother taking care of the bird that calls his girlfriend brainless and Jake Ryan learning Hannah's secret over and over. Also, I could stand up and do the Bone Dance right here on my owm with no assistance.
By the way, could the writers not come up with a new name? We all know Jake Ryan is really Molly Ringwald's love interest on 16 Candles.
Either all the episodes have the same plot, or I keep seeing the DJ Tanner plays new teacher for Raven and Raven goes camping episodes over and over. I also keep seeing Zach and Cody keeping the hotel chef from late-night snacking and Maddie writing a children's book about London's dog until my eyes burn. The worst offender seems to be Hannah Montana, though. I keep seeing Hannah's brother taking care of the bird that calls his girlfriend brainless and Jake Ryan learning Hannah's secret over and over. Also, I could stand up and do the Bone Dance right here on my owm with no assistance.
By the way, could the writers not come up with a new name? We all know Jake Ryan is really Molly Ringwald's love interest on 16 Candles.
2
Bionic Woman
Of all things to decide to remake, they decide to remake this? This was bad 70s TV at its worst ... well, almost worst. 6 Million Dollar Man, okay I can see that one, but it would have to be like 126 Million Dollar man or something, but Bionic Woman? Who cared enough the first time to want to turn it on again in 2007?
It's always seemed this show was nothing more than an excuse to dissect a woman's body and stare at it for awhile, and this new version certainly isn't changing that assumption of mine. Forget about the bionic eye, ear, arm, leg, etc. Give her bionic boobs. It's what the writers really want to do the whole time anyway.
It's always seemed this show was nothing more than an excuse to dissect a woman's body and stare at it for awhile, and this new version certainly isn't changing that assumption of mine. Forget about the bionic eye, ear, arm, leg, etc. Give her bionic boobs. It's what the writers really want to do the whole time anyway.

3
The Simpsons
Yeah, I know. It's a cartoon classic meant for all ages, but could the kids grow up please? Haven't these kids done everything they could possibly do at their current ages? Even the groups on Happy Days, Welcome Back Kotter, and Saved By the Bell eventually grew up. Why can't these people?
It's time for Bart to stop telling people to eat their shorts, for Lisa to take her sax-playing to the next level, and for Maggie to finally talk, other than for just one day. They just need to move on, and while we're at it, so do Itchy and Scratchy.
It's time for Bart to stop telling people to eat their shorts, for Lisa to take her sax-playing to the next level, and for Maggie to finally talk, other than for just one day. They just need to move on, and while we're at it, so do Itchy and Scratchy.

4
The Whole Law and Order Franchise
I can't even keep them straight anymore, and either Jerry Orbach appeared on all the incarnations, or he was just so good it seemed so, and the whole franchise just isn't the same without him around. In six words or less, Jerry Orbach was Law and Order. Period.
We need Law and Order: Ghosts to take it back to Jerry Orbach. We need him on there however we can get him, even if he is deceased. Don't get me wrong, I think Marisa Hargitay is still absolutely beautiful and Christopher Meloni is a necessary component as well, but we need Orbach. We also need Law and Order: Trial By Jury to come back and give Bebe Neuwirth another stab at it.
We need Law and Order: Ghosts to take it back to Jerry Orbach. We need him on there however we can get him, even if he is deceased. Don't get me wrong, I think Marisa Hargitay is still absolutely beautiful and Christopher Meloni is a necessary component as well, but we need Orbach. We also need Law and Order: Trial By Jury to come back and give Bebe Neuwirth another stab at it.

5
All Current Sitcoms
I'll admit, some of the current sitcoms such as Two and a Half Men are funny and well-written, but will any of these stand the test of time? Will we ever see them on TV Land in twenty years as we watch all the shows all over again endlessly?
The answer is no. These are good shows, but there isn't a Dick Van Dyke, Mary Tyler Moore, or Bob Newhart in the bunch. And let's be honest. Seinfeld came along and broke all the rules. Mundane just isn't good enough anymore, even if it's a show about nothing.
The answer is no. These are good shows, but there isn't a Dick Van Dyke, Mary Tyler Moore, or Bob Newhart in the bunch. And let's be honest. Seinfeld came along and broke all the rules. Mundane just isn't good enough anymore, even if it's a show about nothing.

The Simpsons? Damn...it's lame humor at it's best. How about the CSI franchise. The original is ok... the rest blows. I agree with the Bionic woman, if they add bionic boobs I might change my mind. I wonder what they would do? Advanced radar? Search lights? Hypnotize the enemy so she can strike?
posted 246 days ago
Great list and I agree on all, even The Simpsons, which I used to love, but every time I try to watch one now, I say meh, seen it all before.
posted 246 days ago
Oh, and Hannah Montana is horrible. We watch a lot of kids' shows in my house, and some of them -- Kim Possible, for example -- are fun. But I think HM could be the worst of the bunch.
posted 246 days ago
I only watch the old Law and Orders on USA and TNT. That way, if it is not one of the Jerry Orbach or Dennis Farina group, I can turn it off without fear of missing anything.
I used to like SUV until Mariska Hargitay won the Emmy and decided she was an actress, and started eating the scenery.
I love the Criminal Intents with "Tilt head guy" (Vincent D'Onofrio) but hate the ones with Mr. Big.
I think Two and a half Men will be hilarious until the kid gets a little older. But now? I have been known to fall off the sofa gasping for air.
I used to like SUV until Mariska Hargitay won the Emmy and decided she was an actress, and started eating the scenery.
I love the Criminal Intents with "Tilt head guy" (Vincent D'Onofrio) but hate the ones with Mr. Big.
I think Two and a half Men will be hilarious until the kid gets a little older. But now? I have been known to fall off the sofa gasping for air.
posted 245 days ago

4 Comments