Jezebel Saturday, October 27, 2007

We Will Eat Your Babies, Slash Your Tires [The Week That Was]

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We intimidated you with the girth of our shenises.

We threatened to gnaw on your babies.

We encouraged you to embrace the psycho within.

We mourned for a red sox widow.

We pondered the...

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MSNBC Has Made Honest Women Out Of Us [Sex, Lies, And Survey-taking]

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So MSNBC.com has a lil' ol' survey up on its site right now on sex and lying. Ooooh!, your Jezzies thought, We love sex! We love lying! So we took the quiz ourselves to see how we compared against...

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We Hate It When A Boy Breaks Up With Us & We Die Of Consumption [It's A Sickness]

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A few years ago we were really really sick. Everything's all cool now, but to make us feel better, a friend of ours told us that we were a Jane Austen heroine and that we merely had a case of...

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Soooo Ready To End This Day. [Snap Judgment]

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[Japan, October 21. Image via Getty.]

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Pete Doherty: Who Needs Kate? I've Got Mates [Snap Judgment]

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[London, October 26. Image via Bauer-Griffin.]

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Raping A Woman Isn't What We'd Call "Rough Play" [Missdemeanors]

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Welcome back to Missdemeanors, where we issue a virtual spanking to the internet's most popular bloggers for their crimes against Womanity. As requested, this is a delightfully NAME REDACTED-free...

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Why Vote When You Can Drink? [Politics Of Style]

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Washington D.C.'s Lotus Lounge had the genius idea to combine two of our favorite things, politics and alcohol! They've named a drink on their menu for each of the presidential candidates -- and are...

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There's been a lot of buzz about how Fox ... [Fox-y Ladies]

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There's been a lot of buzz about how Fox Business Network seemingly have hotter, more primped female newscasters than other networks. Radar takes the convo a step further by creating a quiz in which...

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We Wish Celebrity Variety Shows Would Come Back In Style [Clips]

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newVideoPlayer("lindacarterkiss_jezebel.flv", 475, 376);

Apparently Lynda Carter had a variety show in like '79 or '80. Above is a clip from it in which she sings "I Was Made for Lovin' You" by...

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A lobbyist friend writes me: "So I'm in a ... [A Day In The Life]

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A lobbyist friend writes me: "So I'm in a southern GOP office (where pretty women, skirts, heels, etc. are still the norm) with a few of my clients. Now, most of the guys I represent are salt of the...

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How Young Is Too Young? [Breaking The Law]

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The Georgia Supreme Court ruled today that Genarlow Wilson's 10 year sentence for having consensual oral sex with a 15 year old girl was disproportionate to his crime. So, after spending 2 years in...

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You know what we love? Puppies! Really, our ... [Puppy Love]

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You know what we love? Puppies! Really, our love of puppies is so great, we can't even fully express it. If we could, we would have a milliony gajilliony puppies and bask in their puppiness every...

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Sean Penn Couldn't Care Less About Red Carpet Events [Snap Judgment]

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[Rome, October 24. Image via FilmMagic.]

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<em>News Flash!</em> Women Can Do Things Men Have Done [Anything You Can Do]

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If anyone actually paid much attention to the U.S. space program, we'd say that the papers are all full of how there was a woman commanding the shuttle Discovery and the International Space Station...

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Hey commenters! This is a reminder about ... [Ladies' Night]

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Hey commenters! This is a reminder about the happy hour meetup in NYC tonight that you guys organized. It's at the Magician (bar on the LES) and it starts at 7 PM. A few of us Jezebels will be there...

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Britney's Not Crazy. She's Just On Deadline. [Broadsides]

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A new study says that women are more stressed than men. We really don't have time to be reading and writing about studies like this because we totally have a big Powerpoint presentation to get and we...

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Why Is Everyone Seeing <i>Why Did I Get Married?</i> We Send A Married To Investigate [Hard Out Here For A Spouse]

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Hey, TGI Friday! What are you doing tonight? Checking movie times? How couple-y of you! You wouldn't by chance be in a monogamous relationship? You wouldn't by chance be trying to solve the age-old...

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Everyone's favorite hot mess may be mess-no-more: ... [Winehouse On The Wagon?]

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Everyone's favorite hot mess may be mess-no-more: after being arrested for pot possession in Norway, Amy Winehouse has vowed to stay sober for the rest of her tour. Last week, she was visibly...

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103-Year-Old Woman Tugs At Tyra's Weave [Clips]

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newVideoPlayer("tyraoldladies_jezebel.flv", 475, 376);

Yesterday's Tyra was all about how we can live a longer life, so she had on two centenarians from the Jewish Home and Hospital in NYC: Clara,...

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A Florida woman decided that the best way ... [Ouch]

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A Florida woman decided that the best way to keep her 13-year-old daughter from fooling around with boys was to forcibly pierce her genitalia, so as to make sex uncomfortable. She also shaved the...

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People Are Talking About Jessica Simpson Behind Her Back [Snap Judgment]

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[Hollywood, October 25. Image via X17.]

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Is John McCain's Daughter Beholden To Special Interests Supplying Her Ugly Boots? [Vagina Monoblogs]

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John McCain's daughter has a campaign trail blog we've been scouring, and the most salient thing characteristic is "Boy is she blonde!" (Also: what's with the purple suit on her mom? Why do people...

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Serious opinion leader Joel Stein uses his ... [Every Day Is Slutoween]

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Serious opinion leader Joel Stein uses his mantle at the LA Times to advance a proposal to abolish Halloween and replace it with a more warmer-climed celebration of getting drunk while wearing...

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Our Sponsors Are Cuter Than Baby Wombats [Sponsors]

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Well, our fearless leader has split town and it's like the wild wild West here at the Jezebel virtual HQ. Or like Kid Nation, or something. But, as always, we need to heap the praise on our sponsors,...

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Idina, Taye & Their Mighty Mutt [Snap Judgment]

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[Beverly Hills, October 24. Image via X17.]

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Green Monsters: Or, What Happens When Your Boyfriend Loves Baseball More Than You [Baseball Widow]

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The other week, Anna asked me to write a follow-up to a post I wrote this summer about being an iPhone Widow, and that's what I originally set out to do. The plan was simple: One morning over last...

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Hotels have to deal with some pretty skanky ... [Travel Troubles]

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Hotels have to deal with some pretty skanky things: There are all those used condoms in trash cans, semen-soaked towels, and bedspreads of which we are pathologically afraid because we hear they are...

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My IUD: How I Learned To Stop Pill-Popping & Love My Cramps [Love The One You're With]

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Despite having an IUD, I was unaccountably thankful when my first post-break-up period arrived recently. I celebrated by getting relentlessly drunk. Before I went to bed, I went to change my tampon,...

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Barbara Walters: Hot In Head-To-Toe Black In Sunny L.A. [Snap Judgment]

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[Beverly Hills, October 25. Image via Splash.]

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Kate Beckinsale Finds Something Really Admirable About Judith Miller [Really Bad Movies]

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Kate Beckinsale is playing ex-New York Times reporter Judith Miller in a movie about the whole Karl Rove-Scooter Libby-Valerie Plame-yellowcakesterfuck. Only in the movie, they change her name to...

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This extremely bitter guy has put the stuff ... [Crap Ebay Listing From A Dude]

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This extremely bitter guy has put the stuff his ex-girlfriend left at his house -- including her laptop -- up for auction on eBay. The best part is that he includes the story of what happened. The...

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American Apparel Ads: Sexy Or Sexist? [American Graffiti]

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newVideoPlayer("aa_rape2.flv", 475, 376);

The giant billboard ad for American Apparel on Houston Street in NYC--of a woman wearing only tights, bent over, legs spread--was defaced this week when...

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Iman & David In Shades Of Gray [Snap Judgment]

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[New York, October 25. Image via Bauer-Griffin.]

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VH1 Reality Star Andre Birleanu: Sexual Harasser Or Just Plain Sexual? [America's Most Scariest Model]

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So it turns out that the hot Russian dude, Andre Birleanu, from America's Most Smartest Model doesn't just play a combative, aggressive asshole on reality TV, he actually is one in real life, too....

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Oh my god, you guys! Mindy Kaling, who plays ... [Scrantonisity]

jezebel.com/gossip/scrantonisity/-315483.php

Oh my god, you guys! Mindy Kaling, who plays my fave character on the Office, the totally awesome Kelly Kapoor, has her own blog called Things I've Bought that I Love! She talks about the funniest...

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How In The Name Of Allah Do You Spend $10 Million On A Bat Mitzvah? [Jezenomics]

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Ten million dollars is one of those sums, like a billion or a gazillion, that is hard to actually get your head around unless you are, like, a celebrity or a CFO of a company or happen to know...

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Gwen Stefani's Bold Coat & Shoes [Snap Judgment]

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[New York, October 25. Image via FilmMagic.]

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Have you heard about the new shopping cart ... [Push It]

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Have you heard about the new shopping cart that helps you burn calories? The cart, being tested in the UK, has a special gearing mechanism that makes it harder to push -- and there's a screen that...

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Can You Maintain Feminist Ideals in the Real World? [Full Frontal Feminism]

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In the November Elle UK, London Times columnist Caitlin Moran offers a primer on "how to stay true to your feminist ideals when you long to be Daniel Craig's sex slave." Though it's an admittedly...

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Renée Zellweger's New Haircut, Little Black Dress [Snap Judgment]

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